The Dynamics of Tipping: A Lesson from Mel Robbins

Mel Robbins, a bestselling author and podcast host, shared an interesting insight from her waitressing days about obtaining larger tips. While working at the Red Rooster Tavern in Michigan, her mentor advised her to pay close attention to women at the table as they can influence the tip.

Robbins recounted this advice to The Wall Street Journal, noting that understanding social dynamics is key. Although many believe a man paying the bill decides the tip, Robbins’ experience suggested that women often play a crucial role. She noted, “When the check comes and the server has been excellent, women frequently tell their partners, ‘She was great. Give her a good tip.'” Robbins emphasized the importance of focusing on women rather than men for better gratuities.

“The secret to a good tip is to ignore the men and to completely take fabulous care of the women,” Robbins stated.

However, hospitality experts warn against neglecting anyone at the table. Robert Mahon, managing partner at Mahon Hospitality Group, expressed that women may indeed influence the tipping decision, but favoritism based on gender is poor service practice. “Skilled servers pay attention to the entire group. Big tips result from making everyone at the table feel well-cared for,” Mahon explained.

Research indicates that psychology plays a significant role in tipping behavior. In 2010, John S. Seiter and Harry Weger Jr. conducted an experiment with 360 dining parties. They studied the effects of compliments on tipping amounts and discovered that compliments significantly increased gratuities.

Lisa Burdette, founder of the Dallas School of Etiquette, agrees that women’s opinions often influence tips. Nevertheless, she recommends servers prioritize treating all customers equally. “A good server should never slight anyone,” she remarked.

Ultimately, those who pay the bill decide on the gratuity, and this should not lead to debates at the table, advised Burdette.

Peter Burke, a lifestyle editor at Fox News Digital, contributes insights into various topics, focusing on food and drink.