Adjusting to Work After Parental Leave: Tips for Success

Returning to work after parental leave can be an emotional and challenging experience. The emotions tied to leaving your child, combined with the task of reacquainting yourself with your job, can be overwhelming. According to Amy Beacom, founder and CEO of the Center for Parental Leave Leadership, the transition from being a “worker” to a “parent” and then to a “working parent” can be quite jarring.

Parents often face the pressure of learning dual roles quickly, often with little sleep, guidance, or support. This is particularly true in the United States, which lacks federal paid leave. A 2012 report noted that one in four women returns to work within two weeks of childbirth. Despite having several months of protected, paid leave, many still find the return to work challenging.

Strategies for a Smooth Reentry

Beacom suggests that returning parents can set themselves up for success by making work more accommodating. Instead of assuming their roles and schedules are fixed, parents should consider discussing adjustments with their employers. Often, companies want to support employees’ happiness and engagement and might be open to flexible arrangements.

• Plan Ahead: Before going on leave, create a plan detailing what a successful return looks like, and discuss this plan with your manager. A brief check-in during your leave can also be useful.
• Start Mid-Week: If possible, return to work in the middle of the week. This approach allows time to adjust and prepare for a full workload.
• Negotiate Flexibility: Small changes, like adjusting your work hours slightly, can significantly benefit your work-life balance. Employers can often accommodate such requests if approached.

Accepting Imperfection

Many parents find their jobs feel somewhat easier post-parenthood. Brain researcher Darby Saxbe, author of the upcoming book ‘Dad Brain,’ explains that parenting introduces complexities that can improve discipline and efficiency. However, this doesn’t make life as a working parent effortless. It’s important to lower your expectations and allow yourself to not excel in every area.

Reshma Saujani, CEO of Moms First, advises being intentional about your responsibilities. Consider what is necessary and what is additional pressure. Understanding these differences can help manage stress effectively.

Give yourself time and patience during this transformative period. Research indicates it can take months or even years to fully adjust post-parenthood. “Respect that this is a transformational time,” Saxbe advises. Be patient and accept that full adjustment may take time.